Did you ever have one of those days when you just felt like you were possibly the worst teacher ever? Your students have no respect for you, they’ve learned nothing and, in fact, everything you are doing is setting them back… possibly to elementary school days. Plus you suck.
I have this never ending conscience battle with my AP seniors. There is a class they are all required to take. In this class, the teacher assigns an extensive research paper. The teacher chooses the topic theme, tells them the due date and never speaks of it again. Until, you know, the due date. The first year I taught AP seniors, I asked this teacher if I was supposed to do anything about this research paper. I was told “no, you don’t have to do anything, unless you want to”. This year the core senior English teacher spent nearly a month dragging those students through the process of writing the paper. He gave me all of his handouts (thank you!), and I gave my students two weeks to do their research. Apparently, they did enough research to complete the required works cited page and then nothing else. Today I had a full scale mutiny on my hands… I didn’t give them time to write anything! I’m making them write papers for my class (during class time, mind you… not as homework), and they all forgot the conversation we had last week about turning in a rough draft on the 15th.
After the arguing, I gave up. I said fine, toss everything I gave you out. We’ll just work on the papers for the rest of the semester. Then I sat down and said basically nothing for the rest of the period. One of my finer moments. And most of the students concluded that it meant they were free to hold conversations about a new student who just moved to the district.
I dunno what to do. I’m feel like I’m failing as a teacher and can’t figure out how to make it better. Maybe this weekend I’ll get some time to figure out something new. Maybe it’s just the winter blues.
PS. I have yet to figure out how the student who wanted to teach junior high is now teaching seniors. I wonder if I can convince someone else in my department to take over the class next year. Seriously.
Comments
He had no idea what I was talking about. Which only proves my point.
Anyway. I feel for you, and I feel the same way. I know I'm not a good teacher, and nothing I try - NOTHING - seems to make any difference.
I'm just a sub, still trying to get a permanent job and some days I think to myself it's no wonder no one will hire me.